You had to have the biiiiig salad!

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I’m a big fan of Seinfeld … and lately I’ve been channeling Elaine Benes, cause I gotta have a big salad! I fill my big salad bowl with lettuce and whatever other veggies I have on hand … tomato, bell peppers, and avocado are my favorites. Then I add some chicken, plus my cheese and dressing … I’ve been alternating between Greek feta dressing and feta cheese, or Kraft three cheese ranch dressing with shredded cheddar cheese. It’s simple but delicious and so filling, and I don’t feel bad after! I like to switch up my salads so I don’t get bored, but I’ve been having one every weekday. I know the cheese is not so great, but most of my ingredients are very healthy. And I used to make my own dressings, but often I’m either too busy or too lazy. Maybe in the summer I will start it up again. And also toying with the idea of starting up my detox again, although I don’t quite have the fortitude yet.

Spring is in the air!

I went for my first run of the year yesterday and it felt great … although my knees were a little sore and I felt a little winded. I know that if I keep it up those things will improve. I especially need to get some weight off to get the pressure off my knees. My dog was a great running companion, as always.

I am so in love … I can’t even believe it, when I think back to where I was this time last year. You never know when you will meet someone so right for you. I thank God every day for bringing Reptile Man into my life.

I don’t mean to sound so sappy, but I am just feeling really positive right now and really thankful to see spring again, and enjoying every little part of my day, even the simplest things like my morning coffee or watching Netflix to unwind at night. How lucky am I.

I’m really looking forward to seeing Counting Crows this weekend, and then on Monday will meet with a specialist so I can finally get some answers about whether or not I will need surgery on my collarbone. Hopefully not, but the not knowing part sucks!

Breakfast of Champions

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Looks like poo, but this was my breakfast every morning for the past week … a banana with a tablespoon of almond butter and a coffee with milk (no sugar). My day starts out great and quickly devolves from there … did a bit of cheating today *coughTim’scough* but still trying to make good choices overall. This weekend will be difficult, as I am going on a road trip with Reptile Man.

New year … will 2015 finally be my year!?

I am not big on New Year’s resolutions, but I have a few this year that might even be attainable.

1. I aim to walk at least 10,000 steps every day

2. Reach my goal weight of 130 lbs.

3. Spend more time with my girlfriends … since I got a boyfriend I have been spending soooo much of my time with him that I feel my friendships are being neglected … and I never want to be “that girl”! (You know, the one who gets a boyfriend and ignores her friends.)

I am enjoying a snow day today … it helps ease me back into the regular workweek. I was only off for two weeks but it felt longer! I really enjoyed the holidays and all the quality time with Reptile Man.

I am on Day 4 of my detox diet, and still going strong … have not touched junk food, alcohol, pop, chocolate, processed foods, or cheese since Sunday. I am hoping to make it to Day 20 this time (last time I tried this, I got hit by a car on Day 5 and it all went to $hit).

Today’s lazy snow day menu was:

Breakfast: 2 cups of coffee with milk (no sugar) and a banana

Lunch: Campbell’s Healthy Request Fiesta Black Bean Vegetable soup (I ate the whole can); and a chicken wrap with ranch dressing, avocado, and romaine lettuce

Dinner: Asian salmon (recipe lifted from a Women’s Health mag); red onion and bell peppers roasted with olive oil; and half a cup of brown rice

Dessert: Oikos Greek yogurt (vanilla) and frozen cherries

I technically did a lot of cheating. For example, I am not supposed to have coffee, bananas, canned soup, tortilla, store-bought dressings, or rice. But considering how I normally eat, I feel like a saint right now and it’s already doing me some good.

Normally I don’t mind shoveling snow in the winter because I need the exercise and I love the fresh air, but unfortunately even 7 weeks after I broke my collarbone, it still hurts even putting a shirt on … so shoveling is out 😦 I have been struggling to find ways to exercise without hurting myself … even walking is difficult now because it’s so slippery out. If I fall down, I could hurt myself reeeeal bad.

Tomorrow is Friday and I can’t wait to see my man … I don’t remember when I’ve ever been this happy! 🙂

And just like that …

… the holidays are almost over!

I am really looking forward to having an enjoyable New Year’s Eve after the last several crap ones. I have an awesome boyfriend to kiss at midnight, a beautiful dress (that I got for sale $30 oh yeah!), and a party to go to.

Speaking of boyfriend, he spent Christmas with me and my family and I couldn’t be happier. We spent six days/nights together in a row (three at my place, then three at his). He spoiled me over Christmas with so many nice gifts, including a key to his apartment ❤ 🙂 Also a beautiful necklace. I am the luckiest, happiest girl in the world. We haven’t had a real “fight” yet (well, it’s only been three months so we should still be on our “honeymoon”), but spending so much time together has caused us to bicker a bit and irritate each other at times. We are currently spending two days apart so we can have some time alone and do the things we need to do … he is working today, actually. I also had a pile of laundry to do (he has no washer/dryer).

Pants are tight, especially with all of the holiday eating and drinking … however, I have started walking again with my dog (my mother the angel was taking care of him and walking him due to my broken collarbone). I am really enjoying the holidays (and time off work) and although I am dreading going back to work (because I have so much to do when I go back), I am kind of looking forward to starting my detox and getting some of this combination holiday/accident weight off.

Gettin’ fappy (fat+happy)

My weight has crept back up to 180, which was very scary for me, after keeping in the 170s throughout most of the summer and fall. I am now at my heaviest weight since late August and not feeling great about it (even though my hot younger bf makes me feel sexy anyways 😛 ).

After the phenomenal success of my 10-day detox diet in the summer (lost 8 lbs. in 10 days), I am going to attempt doing it for 20 days, starting on Monday (after the birthday celebrations of my best friend this weekend). So that’s Monday, November 17th to Saturday, December 6th. I am really nervous but also really excited about it at the same time, and hoping I have success with it again. And I’ll be finished in time for the holidays … I’ll get to indulge without feeling gross in my holiday dresses.

Things are going amazingly well with Snakes … as Nicki Minaj would say, he loves this fat ass … 😛

In all seriousness, he did tell me that he loves me … and I feel the same way. We are doing really well at making it work, even with the semi-long distance. I can’t say enough good things about him and I am so happy. And the sex is just WOW. Sorry for TMI. But it’s true. I love being with him, even if we’re just on the couch watching a movie. He’s so much fun and so easy to get along with. ❤

So I’ll be starting my detox again on the 17th … and I’ll be updating regularly and looking for lots of moral support. Help me! 🙂

So I’m still all about the detox … tried to start it again for the second time, but I did so much cheating I just went completely off the rails … fail! It’s much too humid and summery to not be having a refreshing strawberry daiquiri in my bubble bath on a daily basis. Luckily, I have a very guilt-free strawberry daiquiri recipe: combine in the blender a handful of frozen strawberries (as much as you want), vodka (I usually do 2 or 3 shots), and a big glass of water mixed with Crystal Light pink lemonade (or any kind of lemonade will probably do). That usually yields me two big glasses of daiquiri and puts a smile on my face. Also, the only points come from the vodka (strawberries and Crystal Light are free on Weight Watchers).

So today is kind of like my first real day back on the detox, and I intend to do better this time. On my last detox I lost 8.3 lbs. all told, but gained back 3 lbs. I am hoping to get into the 160s this time … which would put me at my lightest weight since I was in high school.

Another thing that makes detoxing difficult in the summer, besides the fact that every day is a drinking day, is the fact that so many family members are home. My brother is coming home from Hawaii tomorrow, and my sister is coming from Toronto on Friday with my baby niece and I can’t wait!! So I’m sure we will end up doing some drinking while they are home. I guess if I am going to insist on drinking, I can still cut out the other culprits such as chocolate, take-out, and Tim Horton’s iced capps …

Detox time …

On Friday I had my last day of work for the summer (besides the part-time work I’ll be doing, that is). So how did this party animal celebrate? By going to bed by 11 p.m. Friday and Saturday nights. But tonight I will be having some drinks with friends.

And then tomorrow I will be starting the Blood Sugar Solution 10-Day Detox Diet. No alcohol, no caffeine, no sugar, no artificial sweeteners, no dairy, no wheat, no tuna (because of the mercury), and very little fruit. It’s mostly veggies and protein. Wish me luck! This will be very hard but I think I need it … not only to get over the stubborn plateau I seem to have hit, but also it should help clear up some of my nagging health issues like frequent headaches, sinus problems, etc. You’re not supposed to have alcohol for 2 days before starting the detox, but I promised my friends I would go out. I will go cold turkey with everything on Monday. This will be one of the biggest challenges of my life … I don’t even remember the last day I didn’t have any chocolate or sweets. All the more reason to do a detox.

In terms of love life, nothing much is happening. Nothing good anyway. I was supposed to have coffee with a guy I met online and he cancelled at the last minute. And Mr. M decided to waltz back into my life, only to continue being a total a$$. Oh, and he informed me that he never wants to get married or have any more kids. I don’t know why he misled me for the past year on that subject, because he never ever came out and said those things until now (although I suspected). It was very hurtful actually … I know that those are personal choices for everybody, but I think that if he really loved me he would get over the past hurts caused by the Ex-Mrs. M – stop licking his wounds and move on with his life. I mean, he loved her enough to marry her and have a child together, so I can’t help but feel that if he truly loved me he would want to do those things with me too. Not now, but he’s firmly saying that he will never ever do those things. That’s a really strong stance to take. I guess I should be glad I didn’t waste any more time with him and now I can concentrate on myself, and eventually finding somebody who deserves me, cause this guy is a selfish jerk. Oh and he was upset because he found out about my online dating profile … apparently one of his friends found it. Oh well!

Heart broken, body stronger …

Some big news … I am OFFICIALLY single again … had to break up with Mr. M 😦

I guess it was mutual though by the end of it …

There was just too much going against us. Besides the distance and our busy schedules, and his emotional distance and commitment phobia, I was really uncomfortable about his relationship with the Ex-Mrs. M.

I get it that she’s “the mother of his child,” (a phrase I got sick of hearing), but they’ve been divorced for 4 years and we’d been dating for 10 months, so I felt that he should not constantly put her needs and wants ahead of mine. His child, absolutely. His ex-wife, not so much. I feel that I deserve better than to take a backseat to somebody’s ex-wife for the rest of my life. She had gotten to the point of “marking her territory” so much, she might as well pi$$ on him, from making love to his Facebook wall on a daily basis, to (the last straw) asking him to record an album with her. I’d had enough.

I’m glad they are friends for the sake of their child, but their relationship was too weird … and I would have been ok with the album recording, etc. if I felt that they were over each other … but they are clearly not. She has said some not-so-nice stuff about me, and Mr. M has said some not-so-nice stuff about her man … they are both jealous and possessive of each other. He claims that their relationship is “normal and healthy” … I feel that it is anything but. And everyone in my life has encouraged me to leave him, and applauded me for doing so. I realize now that I was not happy. I ended up on anti-depressants for frig’s sake (which I am still taking and I credit for being able to deal with the breakup so well).

But it’s not just about the Ex-Mrs. M … I came to the realization that not only does Mr. M care about her too much, he did not care about me and my feelings. He showed me this time and time again … I can’t even think of one instance where he cared about me or how I felt.

So basically I decided that I’d had enough, I’d sacrificed enough of myself, and it was time to toss this relationship in the trash where it belongs … and although it hurts I’m proud of myself to be on DAY 17 of NO CONTACT! Although he’s made that easy by not contacting me as well. Probably he doesn’t even care that I broke up with him … I would not be surprised.

So now I’m single again at 31 … yes I want to get married and have kids, and every year that goes by that that doesn’t happen, it makes me sad but you can’t force it. I don’t know yet what the future holds for me.

In other news, I have consistently lost weight since I started doing the 8-Hour Diet … to the point that people are noticing now, which makes me feel great. Since the breakup I have been focusing on my weight loss and fitness, even started jogging again … also focusing on myself and my relationships with my friends and family. This is Me time now. No more anxiety over a failing relationship. How liberating!

And also received the awesome news that my work contract is being extended at least until the end of March 2015 … so I am still gainfully employed in a job that I love for the foreseeable future.

Life is good. 🙂

Well it’s been waaaay too long but not a lot has changed.

In point form:

>I turned 31.

>Work is still going great.

>I did not win the Biggest Loser competition, but I did lose 5 lbs. Not great for 12 weeks though. But I started doing this “8-Hour Diet” and it’s working really well. Basically I stopped eating breakfast. It goes against everything that is shoved in our faces about how to be healthy and lose weight, but it’s been working for me. And I’m not as starving as I used to be by lunchtime everyday.

>Relationship is a bit up and down … great for the most part, but having some doubts about it lately … for starters, Mr. M seems to be a bit commitment-phobic … I definitely want to get married and have kids (some day) but he apparently “doesn’t even think” about these things yet … because 1., he’s already done both of those things. And 2., he’s a man, so he doesn’t have this ticking biological clock that I have. Maybe 10 months in is not a good time to discuss these big future plans, but I wonder, how long should I wait at this point in my life? Any thoughts? I figure if we are not moving forward by the 2-year mark at the latest, it’s time to toss it. (And by moving forward, I mean engaged probably). Maybe this is why I’m still single … I guess I scare men away.